The Bid, pt. 2

“No,” he said, more incredulous than chastising. “You can’t- you shouldn’t have sex in the frat house.” His voice was muffled over the receiver by the giggles of girls and the thumping of bass, and at that moment, I finally had something in common with him.

“Yeah. Yeah, I gotcha,” I replied, glancing aside at my quarry, who was now seated on the sofa. It was placed haphazardly on the makeshift dance floor, beckoning couples to add to the collection of stains upon its upholstery. So far, the splotches were from spilled drinks, but I had intended to mark it with my, and someone else’s, essence. “I saw it on some site, you know, one of those, uh-”

“You sound like Joey from Friends. That episode where they get free cable porn, and he thought he could have sex with anyone, anywhere?” I felt my eyes glazing over, and I scanned the meager crowd as he derailed our conversation to talk about a show I would never watch. A minute later, the train was back on track. “You should have more respect for the bros. Actually, you should have more respect for yourself.”

“Respect for myself?” I interjected, playing as if I had listened to his entire lecture. “They made me fill up two extra large soda cups. With piss.” And I did it all for you, I thought.

He chuckled. “Oh! That.” I could almost hear the gears in his head grinding nostalgically as he recalled the “best times you’ll never want to go through again.” After a short pause, he asked, “Did you get the bid?”

“No, brah, I didn’t.” It was bad enough answering other people when they asked, but this time, it felt worse than trying to hide a mediocre report card from my parents, but the inevitable has drawn to a close.

“You might be hurting, but don’t do anything stupid. Well, in your case, don’t do anything that stupid.”

I’m not hurting. Just disappointed. “Roger that.” I hung up and walked through the throng of twisting, sweaty girls. I nodded to each one, but did not stop until I got to the sofa. As I sat, she climbed over and straddled my lap, her blonde curls tickling my face. “Hey, sorry about that… I had to make a call.”

“No problem,” she said, still mesmerized from before. “Say, can I get you something?”

“Yeah, I’ll have what he’s having.” I thumbed at the fratboy-to-be next to me, who was stoned, drunk, and receiving a lap-dance from a girl who wasn’t too easy on the eyes, even under the veil of night. “Make it a double.”

“Seriously?” She asked, an eyebrow arched more in invitation than in question.

“Yes.” I wasn’t in an offensive mood, but at this point, I didn’t care about blowing my chances. I just had to let the situation drag out and for things to go as planned.

She began pivoting her body, and she was about as sexy as a circus seal but as eager as a boa about to squeeze its prey. As she moved further along my thigh, she smiled.

And I hurt.

“Hey, love,” I said, running out of placeholders to call her, since I’ve forgotten her Russian name almost as soon as she mentioned it. “Hold on a second. My keys are trying to claw through my leg.”

“Oh, should I stop?” She was as bright as a doorknob, but I’ve already forgiven her in light of her other assets. I must’ve sighed reflexively, because she got off, and the pain subsided.

She rubbed my thigh with one surprisingly soothing hand, given the pain she just dealt, and brushed my knuckles with the other. I knew where this was going. “Hey, do you have a ride home?” she asked, as her fingers snaked around mine.

“No, I got it covered.” I was going to call a cab, but I was intent on missing the point. My interest started to wane as much as my arousal had, and I turned my head the other way to look at the well-lighted side of the house. Some of the man-boys were playing the usual house party fare, such as beer pong and retro videogames, while others were knocking back shots of liquor that were off-limits to the paying guests. It was painfully noticeable that the girls were on my side of the house, as if cordoned off by the impeded advance of illumination. The amount of ping pong balls that soared through the air was a fitting testament to the testosterone level in that room.

And at the border of light and dark, shitfaced Stevie was puking out his guts onto a pile of black North Face bubble jackets. Luckily, mine was in one of the bros’ bedroom.

“Hold up, I gotta go check on something,” I muttered, more to myself. I headed over to the light side, where Stevie was sprawled over the edge of another sofa. “You probably just pissed off half of the Asian guys here, man,” I joked, referring to the cookie-cutter image that most Asian males have that forces them to dress in the same way. The up-side is that it’s easy to be unique in a sea of clones; on the other hand, I’ll never blend in if I don't dress that way.

“Yeah, they funneled so much liquor into me. Here, take this.” He handed me a shot. “I can’t take much more of this shit.”

Yeah, I noticed.

A well-built Asian hovered over us, conjured by the offer and acceptance of the forbidden alcohol. He was one of the brothers. “What the fuck, we give you the shot, and you hand it off to someone else?” Someone else. Before, I was a rush, and now, I’m just an outsider without a name. He yanked the shot glass from my hand, spilling some as he handed it back to Stevie. “You better take your shit, you little pussy. Don't let me catch you again.” At the sound of cheers and retching behind him, the brother hurried off.

It didn't faze me. “Props. For you getting the bid, Stevie. I never doubted you,” I said, as he slammed the shot, against his better judgment.

“I have never felt so shitty before. Never. Felt. Ugh”

“It’s okay, you’ll get used to it.” I held up one of many buckets lying around and struck a pose as a passing girl memorialized it with her camera. Stevie promptly hurled into the bucket. “Or, you’ll have to.” She handed me the camera, and I was somewhat pleased to see that I didn't look that goofy. Stevie, with his face buried in the bucket, took the brunt of shame. As I handed the camera back, I heard a familiar voice.

“-Yeah, Stuy kids are such herbs,” I heard, not too far away, from a Stuy graduate who was from my year. There was no irony in his statement, as he meant none. I knew who it was directed towards; if I was in less hostile territory, they would be fighting words. I glanced while patting Stevie’s back, and noticed that he was speaking to a younger Stuy graduate, who received a bid earlier in the day. “That’s right,” the other agreed. “Fucking herbs.”

I couldn’t help myself, but I sneered. Instead of flirting with nubile hotties, they were disgruntled and talking among themselves. It’s not that the opportunity hadn’t presented itself; they were devoid of it. For them, it would be easier trying to be the top in the showers of a maximum-security prison.

My mind buzzed as it generated conversational spools, from the initial retort to the inevitable counters down the line. I caught myself forming a fist with my left hand, the bones cracking as I did so; it was a tic I needed to control. Did they notice? I wondered. I replaced the bucket, making sure not to spill its vile contents. As I turned to face them, I felt a slightly tug at my elbow.

Oh. It wasn’t Stevie. Instead, she was a Korean girl. Without the unholy bucket as my shield, I am now my own chink in my armor.

“Hey, what are you doing over here?” Her cascading inflection said it all; she didn’t expect a response. “Let’s dance.”

For a moment, I thought about resisting and playing hard-to-get, as is generally advisable by smarter men. But, hey, she was attractive, and she seemed to glow under the light. Iwasn't ready to burn this bridge just for some superficial chest-thumping.

I nudged Stevie’s head off of my shoulder. The graduates were looking at me, awaiting my response. They received none.

I stood, and I was whisked back into the darkness, away from the land of trivial men.

-v